Emelia's Story
“I’m an adult, and sometimes even adults need guidance, you know? It feels wonderful to have somebody there showing that they care, showing that if you need any answers, they are going to find the answer right then and there. They have never given up on me, so I’m really thankful. It feels real frickin’ awesome just to have them.”
Sixteen-year-old Emelia was devastated as she sat by her mother’s hospital bed and watched her life exhaled through the dying woman’s last breath.
Her devastation quickly turned to utter despair as Emelia’s 6-month-old baby was taken from her arms by Child Protective Services. Emilia and her younger brother were sent to one foster home, while the infant and Emelia’s youngest brother were placed in another because they had no family in San Antonio to care for them.
She lost both her mother and her daughter in that tragic moment nine years ago and has been trying to rebuild her life ever since.
Emelia was no stranger to foster care. She and her brothers first entered the system when she was 12 years old after police were called to the many domestic disputes in her home. She credits the police with saving her family because their mother finally escaped their abusive father.
“They helped my mom run from it,” she says with lingering emotion. “Thanks to them, my mom, she got another chance to live. So that’s why I want to be a cop.”
Emelia’s teenage years had already been cut short when she got pregnant at 15. She was a bright student with dreams for the future and a supportive mother. But since the loss of her mom and the battle to get her daughter back, she has faced an uphill battle into adulthood.
Awash in grief from death and separation of family, she became depressed, dropped out of high school and shut down emotionally. She was reunited with her daughter, but at times has struggled to keep a roof over their heads. Her employment options were limited without a high school diploma, transportation and proper daycare.
“It’s been really rough, but every time when I want to give up, I can’t. I look at (my daughter) and she’s the reason why I want to keep going. She’s the reason why I want to be a somebody,” Emelia says. “I’m still struggling with abandonment issues, depression, because when my mom died, I lost myself. I lost my best friend. So I’m trying to overcome all of that. I’m also trying to overcome my fears. And every day I’m one step ahead.”
She has taken two big steps with steady employment at Whataburger and online classes to get her GED through Restore Education.
“Hopefully I can finish school by no later than the middle of October, but I’m trying to finish sooner. I’m trying to become a police officer and, if I can make it, then I’ll (continue school to) be a lawyer,” she says.
While navigating this journey, Emelia has found support from THRU Project, a nonprofit organization that provides mentors and resources to former foster children who have aged out of the foster care system. They youth are thrust into the world, all alone, to figure out how to survive and become independent. More than 1,500 former foster youth age out each year in Texas, with hundreds in the San Antonio area alone. A staggering number of these youths are homeless, unemployed, uneducated, pregnant, incarcerated and addicted.
THRU Project helps foster youth transition to independent adulthood by providing mentors, cell phones, bus passes, life skills training and safe, affordable housing. It connects aged-out foster youth with social service agencies and other non-profits that have the resources they need.
“THRU Project helped me a lot. Like when I needed help with my rent, they put me in their housing program for a year. And then they helped me with my cell phone bill as well. If I needed food, gift cards, they were right there,” Emelia says.
She also knows she can call THRU Project staff when she is overwhelmed and simply needs a pep talk to keep going. She says they’ve been steadfast and have encouraged her over the years to get her GED and move forward. She says they have never judged her, even when she’s made mistakes.
“I’m an adult, and sometimes even adults need guidance, you know? It feels wonderful to have somebody there showing that they care, showing that if you need any answers, they are going to find the answer right then and there. They have never given up on me, so I’m really thankful. It feels real frickin’ awesome just to have them.”
With new possibilities in reach, Emelia has a few new dreams. She wants to go skydiving. She wants to travel to Paris.
Mostly, she wants to be a good mom.
“I find inspiration in my daughter. She motivates me to do what I got to do for her,” she says.
Emelia still very much misses her own mom. “Oh, her laughter, her smile. Those are the things I miss about my mom, her warmness, her cooking, her the Orozco boil water,” she says wistfully. “And when my mom used to sing to me in the kitchen making tortillas with the Spanish music full blast…
“I miss her telling me, ‘I’m proud of you.’”
She says she feels her mom’s presence when a butterfly lands on her and when it’s raining. “I remember before she died she told me, ‘When it rains, that’s the closest I’ll be to you.’ So every time it’s going to rain in my own backyard, I’m going to run outside. I get in the middle of the rain, close my eyes, take a deep breath, and I just feel it. I feel my mom.
“I feel like she’s living through my daughter because my daughter got her smile, her big blue eyes. I’m glad she actually took her last breath seeing her.”
To help former foster youth like Emelia:
